Of Posts, Followers, WordPress, And Paper Shredders


It’s been a while since I last wrote about something, so how’s this work again? Oh yeah, I remember now.

I write this small but tall tale, one which no one else is able to identify with, and then I delibrately change the direction of the story. This I do as a substitute for a plot twist whenever I’m working without a plot—which is practically every post.

I then infuse my narration with all kinds of humor—so far, 1,602 kinds and counting, and still the laugh meter is saying no hits recorded! Maybe it’s broke?

But hey… another one of my post gets published!

That, of course, is all that matters—unless you’re a WordPress employee in charge of making sure none of my posts ever see’s the light of day—which sometimes happens.

And should one of my posts ever (accidentally) make their Discover page, then you just might catch one of those employees attempting to leap off a window ledge somewhere.

Probably on a first floor—unless perhaps they live in a multi-story house or apartment complex—then all bets are off.

That’s because, “Automattic” (the San Francisco office of WordPress) recently closed their doors. Seems their employees have been working from home so much of late that they didn’t need an office anymore.

Or maybe it’s because so many of my posts have seen the light of day, that WordPress felt they had to save face.

I can dream, can’t I?

Nevertheless, I have had a few comments of late (too few to mention), saying how much I’m missed by my followers and that they hope I will write again soon.

As a result of this revelation, I’m conducting a thorough investigation to see if any of these wonderful folks are on my payroll, which should result in there getting a raise—just in case I actually do have a payroll.

However, if they don’t happen to be on my payroll (still investigating), and seeing how much of what I do write about here (well all of what I write about here) barely passes for little more than a ridiculous take on nothing of consequence—I can only assume these folks have an empty paper shredder in need of something to consume.

Hmm… could account for why my followers miss me?

Nah! Gotta be ’cause they miss me—gotta be.