WordPress, My Followers, And Paper Shredders

 

It has been a while since I last wrote about something, and I’m not sure if I remember how this works. Oh, I remember now.

I write this small (but tall) tale, one which no one else is able to identify with, and then I deliberately change the direction of the story. I do this as a substitute for a plot twist whenever I’m working without a plot—which is practically every post.

I then infuse my narration with what I feel passes for humor—1,602 kinds of humor and counting — and that’s when the laugh meter say’s no hits were recorded.

Maybe the laugh meter is broken?

Still, I managed tp publish another post and that’s all that matters—unless you’re a WordPress employee in charge of making sure none of my posts ever see the light of day.

Should one of my posts ever make their Discover page, I suspect the employee put in charge of preventing that from happening, would likely leap out of an upper story window of WordPress—provided they still have an upper story.

That’s because, “Automattic” (the San Francisco office of WordPress) recently closed their doors. Seems their employees have been working from home so much of late, that they didn’t need an office anymore.

Maybe it’s because so many of my posts have been seeing the light of day, so much so, that maybe WordPress felt they had to save face by closing their office doors.

I can dream, can’t I?

Nevertheless, I’ve had a few comments of late (too few to mention), saying just how much I’ve been missed by my followers and that they hope I will soon write again.

As a result of this (encouraging) revelation, I am now conducting a thorough investigation of all my blog followers to see if any of these wonderful folks are on my payroll—which might result in there getting a raise.

That is, if I have a payroll?

On the other hand, seeing how much of what I do write about, well all of what I write about, barely passes for little more than a ridiculous take on nothing of consequence, I can only assume these folks needed something to feed to their empty (and hungry) paper shredders.

Which might account for why so many of my post never see the light of day on WordPress, as I use a typewriter to type out all my ideas first before posting them into my blog.

Nah, paper shredders don’t get hungry.

Do they?

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