Sleepless Everywhere But In Seattle

If you are an NFL fan—whoops just lost most of my female readership (all 2 of you), well then watching Seattle, AGAIN, and New England for the sixth time in thirteen years, play in a Super Bowl, may be coma inducing.

For anyone sleeping under a rock, the so called 12th man roared with delight yesterday at that winning touchdown in overtime against the Packers. Who would have thought just one guy could have caused such a seismic event? Yet I’m willing to bet Seahawk fans slept soundly around the Puget Sound last night.

Now I’m not a Packer backer, but my wife wears a cheese head—which must have been shear torture for her. No not the hat, the loss. And if you’re a 49er fan—as yours truly—then you’ve already been sleepless for well, in fact, over a year now, because beating the Seahawks has proved to be a baffling puzzle for the 49er’s.

Okay, I grant you New England Patriots fans slept way too well last night, because of a 45 to 7 win over the Indianapolis Colts in the AFC Championship game. But this one-sided affair may have been somewhat tainted by under-inflated footballs.

Hey was everyone snoozing in the NFL office? I wonder who was watching the Patriots just to make sure they were not tampering with the footballs? But for the record, if the pigskins were under-inflated, how come New England benefited more than the Colts? Well…just asking.

NFL teams and their fans are not sleeping at night, and here are just some of the reasons why.

Let’s start with the good commissioner Roger Goodell—now there’s an oxymoron for you, and pleading ignorance too—at least he’s honest. The brilliant way in which he handled that Ray Rice case.

Contributing to our lack of sleep, worries by the fans over how unbalanced judgements are being handed down by the office of the NFL when it comes to all those criminal off-field actions by certain players—likely they’re too busy counting all that money.

We suffer through sleepless late nights with Jimmy Fallon (high ratings) over the problem of how the NFL plans to put games on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday. The NFL only has games on… wait for it—four days out of the week.

Finally, what is with all those atrocious calls being made by the zebras during games this year? My god its a zoo out there.

This illustrates not only the need to define the rules more clearly, and realistically, but also why they need professional officials to call games, and not wealthy bankers and such who do it for kicks.

Why its enough to make fans go sleepwalking out of stadiums all over the country. Fan apathy, where’s the sandman when you need him?

No pictures please, that flash, I’m trying to sleep here!