These days, with all politicians throwing their hats into the ring in an attempt to become president, we’re likely to get an education on how to play fast and loose with the facts. But then again, politicians are experts at that sort of thing, and I’m only an amateur—or am I?
So, would you like to hear my theory on playing it loose with the facts?
Well too bad, I have a few twisted examples before I can complete another ridiculous post. So sit down—please!
First of all, Mark Twain once said, “Get your facts first, than you can distort them as you please.”
For example; George Washington was the first president of the United States, that’s a fact—but he also had wooden teeth. Donald Trump is running for president of the United States, another fact—but he has SOMETHING on his head.
These are the facts, but I’m playing fast and loose with them.
How about a factoid? it’s not really a fact. In reality, it’s a word with an o-i-d added on. That’s verifiable, but a factoid is not.
For those in the know this won’t come as a big shock, but Disney World is not really a world—just a theme park. And, just try New York City, just try and prove to the world (any world) that you’re a Big Apple. You can’t—can you?
Bruce Jenner is not a complete woman—well not yet anyway.
Their might be giants, but it won’t be the San Francisco or New York Giants. Both are frauds! Here’s why—(Y).
Now that that silliness is out of the way here’s why I called both Giant teams, big fibbers.
Justin Maxwell who plays for the San Francisco Giants is only 6’5′ inches tall, and he’s their tallest player.
And Chris Canty and Matt McCants of the New York Giants are the tallest on their team, and each is only 6’7 inches tall. Hardly Giants among men, wouldn’t you say? So those Giants (both of them), aren’t really Giants at all! Oh, that’s a bonus fact. No charge… oh, and that’s a bonus, bonus fact!
Bet you all knew that Pluto was considered a planet long before 1919. The International Astronomical Union (IAU) doesn’t think so though. They decided to declare Pluto a dwarf planet. No problem, the (IAU) hasn’t been around as long as Pluto—in fact only SINCE 1919.
Elvis sightings are real—even if Mr. Presley is gone—that includes that short order cook at the Sahara.
Sgt. Joe Friday (Jack Webb) from “Dragnet” fame made a living saying “Just the facts mam” even to the men!
Okay, I made that last part up, but I couldn’t leave it at that, not with a cheap laugh still out there to be had. You know, I’m actually starting to feel more like an expert on this subject now.
Anyway, that’s my theory on playing fast and loose with the facts. Now you could appoint a fact finding committee to check them out, but please keep in mind what Albert Einstein once said…