I admit I was only suspicious at first; the idea of an evil Empire being bought by Disney? But then it occurred to me; who better than the Disney people. Lets face it; who has all the money, all the power, all the influence, and now—The Force? Folks; DISNEY IS BUILDING ANOTHER DEATH STAR!
Why at this very minute, I’m willing to bet Darth Vader (with his new mouse ears helmet—designed by Disney Imagineers) is thinking up ways to prevent, yet another weakness being identified by the Rebel Alliance, which could result in another Death Star explosion. Think of the insurance risk!
Not to mention the fallout. Heads will roll… and they might be ours. But, he really should talk to Farmers.
Right now I suspect that more than a few of you out there are thinking, “this guy is probably more than a little crazy.” And I’m guessing the rest of you—are absolutely certain of it!
However, I feel it my responsibility to warn all of the human-race of an impending doom—with the possible exception of ISIS, Al Qaeda, and Marty Gunther—who used to beat me up all the time throughout the fourth grade after school.
When George Lucas first started running the Star Wars Empire, he didn’t have the kind of money, power, and influence required to build a powerful intergalactic juggernaut capable of universal mass destruction. This was no doubt due to his wanting to build Lucas Ranch in Marin County instead.
So he had to borrow money from a movie studio in Hollywood. You’ve heard of Hollywood? Well it used to be a planet, still is, only now its known as Planet Hollywood. Anyway, they know a thing or two about promoting an idea—that’s not yet a reality.
Then one day the Disney Empire, who has its fingers into everything (and apparently connections with former President Ronald Regan, who dreamed up the Star Wars defense system-which was to act from space in our defense), decided to build a Star Wars ride. George must have been duped into giving his blessings.
Well one thing led to another, but I have no idea what either of those things are. So I guess I can’t talk about them now, because they have no bearing on this subject what so ever.
But back to the subject of the evil Galactic Empire located in a galaxy far, far away, but coming real soon to a planet near you.
When the real Emperor Palpatine found out that Disney had the rights to open a Star Wars ride in Disneyland, he must have infiltrated the Disney Corporation. The perfect cover, a family destination. Although, that must have been a real neat trick. Have you ver seen how this guy looks? Well there you go.
Anyway, Palpatine had to figure George Lucas must have intrusted the little R2 unit (now owned by Disney) with the technical blueprints for the designing, and building of a real Death Star.
He had to have reasoned, that by capturing R2D2 he could sell a lot of popcorn with the making of another Star Wars movie. So he lured all the old cast members in, with the promise of bit parts, and now he probably has them too!
No opposition to the building of his new massive Death Star. Don’t you see people?
We’ve got to stop them and all the Imperial Storm-Troopers. We have to… hey, what are you guys doing with that straight jacket, and what about that big needle, your not gonna—Oh, Obi Wan, help me, you’re my only hope!
The end is nigh . . . run for the hills (and invest in popcorn farming).
My youngest makes for a perfect Darth Vader, don’t you think? :O)
That your youngest? Tell Darth Vader we’re afraid, very afraid!
He’ll get a kick out of that. He auditioned for the part. I told him he didn’t get it because his voice was too soprano. Well, he flew into a rage. Yes, I was afraid, very, very afraid. I had no choice then, so I gave him the part anyway. Some will cry nepotism, but the way I see it, that’s different than tears. :O)
haha. I can see it! Long live nepotism!
Maybe someday he’ll let me be his mini me. 😀
Stop it! I don’t WANT to go to the bathroom right now. But if you carry on, I’ll have to.
You’re not going to flush me are you?
Ah, good idea! But I was talking about my bladder.
Oh I don’t wanna talk biology. 😀
Haha. Long live nepotism!
Lol, now I’m really sure that Disney is evil!
Also, look at the signiture of Walt Disney, it resembled 666!
Whoa! OMG that is amazing!
Hope the injection was successful! Stay off the caffeine!
Just woke up from my snooze. Gonna get a triple shot Latte from Starbucks. I’ll be as right as rain in no time at all! Then its off to the Washington Post to tell my story, just as soon as I figure out how to get out of this padded cell.
More than a few people think you’re crazy? Only more than a few?…:)
Thank god. I was afraid it was the masses.
All while others have this reaction :D….https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYHdQUyOunA
I know! Makes you wonder if they saw the same preview huh? Don’t they understand? We’re about to face the same fate as Alderaan, and I need to… no wait, not that needle again! (o.
Will Disney’s new slogan be “the happiest evil empire on earth”??? ; )
Well Jan, if I have anything to say about it, it will. But every time I start to say something, these two guys suddenly show up out of nowhere and with a straight Jacket and needle. I hope that needle doesn’t have an air-bubble! :Oo
Should have been “Disneyland’s new slogan…
Yeah! If it weren’t for all those pesky Stormtroopers walking around rounding up the tourist, it might have been a real neat theme park idea.
Stormtroopers in Disneyland sounds really fun…. Ewoks, even better.
Yep, because they’re on our side.
And they’ll pose for shots with us and everything.
You mean—there not above photo bombing? Why those…
Ha ha mmmhmm
You have officially gone to the dark side since you won’t help Marty. Even Bully’s need saving? (oh, what am I saying- sick the ewoks on him) where they sing that song over-n-over kind of like it’s the small world ride.
Nice recovery. For all we know, he may have already gone over to the dark side.
I commented instead of just liking 😛 Hope Obi Wan got there in time.
He’s said he’s sending Luke and Han. Come to think of it, they should have been here by now, that was back in 1977. God I need a razor, look at this beard.
It was fun reading this one. 🙂
Just a suggestion: Go to Settings>Sharing, and select the checkbox – Front Page, Archive Pages, and Search Results Now if someone visits your blog, he/she may like the post without opening the post separately. It will help you get more likes on the blog.
Thank you (Poetry) for that idea. I’m technologically challenged (as you might have guessed) and am still bumping into walls and taking my lumps here at wordpress. Ah, but the little people, I love em, and I can’t deny my public this kind of genius forever (say nothing of the glow I’ll get from more likes). I shall go post haste, and do as instructed. Mostly because I’m an idiot, but largely because I was clueless about that little nugget. Seriously though, thank you very much for the suggestion, I really do appreciate it. :O)
Gosh! Look how you have a way with words. Jumbling up the 26 alphabets and forming a perfect word and then rearranging them to make perfect sense. I love your humour. 😀 This one made me giggle. Always keep this lil cheeky child in you alive and spread the lively energy around the world. 😀
And don’t worry, we are all learning here. It’s never to late to learn and grasp new knowledge. 😀 Enjoy the afterglow. 😉 Continue bringing smiles to your readers. 😀
Your delightful response has me grinning ear to ear. Meaning its a good thing I still have all my teeth. 😀
Just eat healthy, brush twice a day and make all your horrendous dentist appointments on time. And they will remain intact and shiny for long, long time. 🙂 And after that, one can always own a pair of healthy, shiny and gummy dentures. 😉 😀 😀
I employed the help of Scotty to get here. You are wrong about something though. Disney is actually using R2D2 to make popcorns, and Lucas is now Honorary Council Member of Parks & Recreation Committee, Inter Galactic Division.
Of course, I like to pluralize something collective like the popcorn. Think peoples and it will be good.
From a singular point of view, I know what you mean.
If that’s all I’m wrong about, I’m even better than I thought! Which is something I seldom do. This is great news. Now someone might take me seriously.
That’s quite a stretch. Hydrocephalus is a bad thing.
Is it? Now I am worried. All I thought I had was a fat head from an enlarged ego. Instead I find I’m in serious condition… HELP!
Your attic is cluttered, so I believe that will also help de-clutter. Increase dosage as necessary 😀
As long as I don’t become a hoarder, that’s all I ask.
Well that one piece of popcorn was great. What I lacked in volume, I made up for in calories from the butter consumption.
Careful for it not to go to your hips!
Aggressive progression is understandable but preventable. Lobotomy might be too drastic for you. How about add a tablespoon of Vicks in a pot of boiling water? Inhale the vapor. I heard that works.
Thank you doctor. Hey you don’t happen to be a doctor who uses a Tardis to get around do you, or have an honorary title of doctor?
Now that the secret is out, I actually do. Tardis is sooo unhip, I use a tuktuk. You can call me Dr. PD, WebMD. I go to youtube when in doubt.
Thank god, I’m in the hands of a specialist!
I am glad you met me.
Me too. I feel better already doc.
Good. You’ll receive the bill in the mail with an autograph picture of Sheev.
From The Dukes of hazard? I’ve wanted his autograph for years. This is my lucky day!
Ha ha ha!
If that wasn’t the most useless , senseless banter ever, I don’t what is lol.
Well, we’ll work on it. 😀
Where do I sign up for a lightsabre? I already have the mouse ears?
When the Force Awakens in you (this will be on Dec. 18th, of this year), you will be anointed with the light sabre of the mouse, making you a member of the order of the ears. This is a very high honor! I’m extremely envious—powerful, you will be… and a teensy weensy bit green, but don’t worry about that part.
Will be sure to make a note of that in my calendar! Hmmm green could be an issue with matching my current wardrobe but at less I have time to address that.
Yes, don’t rush out to the Disney Store and do any unnecessary impulse buying just yet. Just sit back and cool your heels at a soothing Disney resort, and when the time is right then pounce on those bargains. ;o)