When the quality of a post is in question you have to blame the writer—but not so in my case. And it’s a terrible thing when you decide you have to take legal action against someone, especially when it’s someone close to you. Particularly when that someone happens to be your own brain.
You see in recent weeks, and on more than one occasion, I have had some wonderful ideas, many of which would have made a great posted addition to mine, or any other blog. However; my brain has turned to a life of crime.
In some countries when someone steals from you they chop their hands off. But this is not just anybody we’re talking about, this is my brain, and it doesn’t have any hands—or a body for that matter.
I hear some of you right now saying; “He’s lost his mind!”
Well, you’d be wrong. You see, I’m left handed, and left-handed people are the only ones in their right mind. Besides its not my mind in question here, its my brain, and its not missing, for how else could it steal from me if it were absent?
And I’m not brain dead either.
Perhaps your thinking that this is just another hair-brained scheme to sue someone in court for lots of money? Nothing could be further from the truth—I’m suing my brain, its not suing me.
All I can say is; my brain has got a lot of nerve if it thinks it can steal my ideas and get away with it, I mean—where’s it gonna go, right?
These are the facts.
And the evidence continues to mount. I got suspicious when I started to notice that whenever I would get a great idea, it would slip my mind. The next thing you know, it would get locked away in my brain. Trying to retrieve these ideas then became nearly impossible.
For example: The other night I was having a terrible time coming up with an idea for a post. Suddenly, as I was drifting off to sleep, this brilliant idea came to me. As I was exhausted (and nearly asleep), I tried repeating the idea to myself until I found myself fast asleep.
When I woke up, try as I might, I couldn’t recall the idea at all—it had been stolen by my brain.
I’m convinced that my brain is behind the hijacking of many of my dreams as well, and I’m willing to bet I’m not alone in this theory. Just ask yourself; how many dreams do you actually remember upon waking up? Maybe we can bring a class action suit against this little three pound menace?
Uh-huh… tell me I’m not on something now? I mean ONTO something.
Whaddya mean I need a rest? Of course I need a rest. I haven’t slept a wink since I figured out who (I mean) or what, has been stealing my ideas!
See you in court Medulla Onblongata, or whatever part of you it is that’s stealing from me.