Have You Become A Slippery Tongue Devil?

slip of the tongue

People call you a master linguist. Words just seem to slip off your tongue. Mind you, people don’t recognize some of them, but Merriam Webster has nothing on you.

Others have gone so far as to say (because new and strange words escape your mouth at will) that you must be working on your own lexicon, or possibly a new accent.

There was that time (for no apparent reason) the word “paapel” came out—instead of the word, people. Everyone thought you were born and raised in California. Apparently not. Perhaps you had a secret upbringing in the south that even you were unaware of.

Maybe you drank moonshine and wrestled pigs all day in your bare feet during your hillbilly youth. Possibly could explain why you don’t remember any of it—or would even want to.hillbilly

scotsmanOn another occasion, the phrase  “I no can do it.” escaped your lips, while you were trying to avoid working overtime on a Friday. You sure know how to turn a phrase. Your boss thought he had hired a foreigner, saying, “I didn’t know you were from Scotland?”

But (now that you’re an adult), in your defense, your family has taken to telling folks, “Oh… he’s been talking in tongues ever since he was an infant.” Of course, back then, you had an excuse.baby boy

But that’s not all you can do. Everyone (especially your family) is amazed at your ability to abbreviate long words—verbally.

For instance; the big ooops is no stranger to you. Remember that time you were showing your boys how to use a hammer. You were telling them, “Boys, this is how its done.” How could you have known you were about to give a lecture on four letter words.

But, after you hit your thumb, you weren’t talking about vegetables (or food for that matter), when you exclaimed, “Shiitake Mushrooms!” Only you stopped short of adding—the ake and the word, mushrooms.

hit your thumbYou, and your boys, had no idea you were about to give another language lesson. But crimson so becomes you…or at least your boys must have thought so.

How else do you explain the rolling around on the ground hysterics of your boys, as you put a nail through your foot (protruding from the board you dropped) while you ran around in agony gripping your pulsating thumb, and then tripping over the open toolbox you left out.

You were in all your glory that day, not to mention you revealed your hidden expertize in the use of four letter words. Who knew? You probably wished you were more proficient in Latin—not that you would have been able to call upon it in that particular moment.

Yep, you sure have a way with words—you silver tongue devil you.

 

 

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18 comments on “Have You Become A Slippery Tongue Devil?

  1. My mother who was never foul mouthed would get….ummm….excited when she was sewing. I would hear a litany of some of the most unusual words when things didn’t go right!

  2. I am beginning to think it is a very good thing you and I have never met. Things could go drastically wrong, horrifically wrong. Oh, and let me know when you start saying your words backwards. If you don’t already.

  3. Hahaha! I am infamous for being unable to get through a sentence without using the the words whatchamacallit or whatshisname! So many holes in my brain where words should be – I lose my glasses all the time too and end up wandering the house patting on the surface of everything looking for them!

    • Why… thank you. My little brother would resort to saying (as opposed to the F-word, especially if dad happened upon us at the wrong moment), “Ah Fuuu—Ferdinand Magellan!— And as a result, he was spared death, or at the very least, a bar of soap to suck on.

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